Shadow Net Series 6: Will Work For Boobs

A website that lets you work your body to upgrade your body.

Rita Rudner once said, “Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it’s quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.” With the internet has finally caught up to the comedian. 

Let me state something right from the get go, if I may. I don’t give a shit what people do. I firmly believe everyone should be able to do what they want, screw who they want, smoke and drink what they want as much or as little as they want as long as it’s not hurting anyone else. I’m not judging members or contributors of at all. That’s not what I do here and I want everyone to do what they need to to be the happiest version of themselves. You do you. 

That being said – myfreeimplants is a pretty interesting business model. For a monthly subscription fee of $9.95 a month you’re allowed access to a cache of model’s photos and videos. The subscription fee goes towards the cost of the person’s enhancement procedure. Boobs ain’t cheap and no one understands that better than myfreeimplants. A model that now seems pretty outdated compared to websites like OnlyFans but thats besides the point.

They even do butts – that’s mine on the left.

Skimming through the site it seems like they’re pretty thirsty for some social media influencer love. With a referral program that pays the influencers for each person they get on the site. One of the most interesting aspects of the site I found was the Hall Of Fame – featuring women that had successful operations now showing off their new found confidence. 

I was high on the idea that this whole thing could have been a woman’s creation, empowering woman to take money from rich pigs that stare at their breasts anyways – however a Hall Of Fame wall brings me crashing back to Earth – my fall from blissful smart assed pie-in-the-sky SmirkLand is propelled by the sad reality that the internet always just boils down to sex. If a “Hall Of Fame” feature (not to mention an option for women to upload up to 25 photos of themselves) doesn’t scream that this was born over a keg at some Ivy League frat house party and not at a Bra Burning session, I’m not sure what does.

A GoFundMe model that protects people’s privacy has its plusses but I think the website could be used for a bit more good than just adding more silicone to Los Angeles or upping a cup size on an already unfairly gorgeous Swedish 20-something. An injection of openness could see the website fund those who are going through hormone therapy. What about penis extensions (Do they do those?) for those men who need a bit of boost to put them in a more confident and self loving place ? (But seriously, do they do those?)

But most importantly – keeping our eyes on the prize – since the website says it’s about a lot of things and not just boobs (even though it is all about the boobs) an injection of chivalry could help those who may need us most. What about helping victims of breast cancer and others who have been forced to have a Mastectomy due to life and death situations. Theres nothing wrong with a Hall Of Fame for new – confidence boosting boobs on young, healthy people but a Wall Of Warriors alongside it might help keep things in perspective.

I didn’t choose to post any screen shots of the website as to not accidentally disclose any members actual identities. But if you’d like to visit the site yourself go to: free

Buy Me a Coffee at

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: